Cosmic Jokes :: Pt. 2

When we moved into this apartment complex things didn't seem so bad. However, as the fates will it, some time went by and annoyances like neighbors, loud car stereos and what not started popping up. Before we knew it trash was being thrown on us from above, people would park their cars at 3 a.m. and leave their headlights on (just in case the dark was bothering us while we slept) and groups of random men would collect in the parking lot. At any given time, afternoon & all night, we'd be surrounded by bunches of rowdy, loud drunks blasting their car stereos, chilling with a case of beer and using our enclosed dumpsters as private urinals. Later we even found out that alot of these people don't even live here and are in fact just hanging out so they might use our volley ball court as one would a public park. How lucky for us!

As we all know the fates would never rest at simply throwing little annoyances at us, now would they? As it is, smoking is not allowed in this home and one has to step outside if they wish to do so. This is pretty much the only time anyone in this apartment loiters, since we listen to music, drink our beer and keep our guests indoors.

Recently it seems the security guards are doing their jobs and have decided to clean up the parking lot and it's actually getting more quiet and more enjoyable to live here. So of course, it's time to make us the assholes!

A friend comes to visit, carrying a 12 pack. My significant other is outside having a cigarette. While they wait to finish up, our friend sets down the 12 pack and they lean against the door to enjoy smoking. As our (shitty) luck would have it, this is when the recently non-existant guard shows up. The guard makes a huge stink, demands they enter the home and develops the biggest hard-on for this apartment. No matter what time of day, drinks-in-hand or no, he makes double sure to pass by, slow down to watch us and make sure we aren't acting up anymore. Hooray!

Just goes to show you: never slip up, asshole!