Won't You Be My Neighbor

I am in amazement at just how big of an asshole I really am...

As our empty little apartment complex fills up, so too do the parking spaces. I have had my car parked in the exact same spot for the past ten months and all day yesterday I had no errands (Okay, maybe I did but I didn't attend to them!) so I had no need to move it at all. As I stepped outside to get some fresh air I noticed a man standing near my car with his hands on the door. He also seems to be holding a piece of paper. Upon seeing myself and two others emerge from our apartment he drops the piece of paper and runs away. We all watch him talk smack to a friend, act tough and retrieve things from the trunk of his car. It's a new neighbor!

Once the man goes into his apartment, we make our way over to see what exactly that paper was. A note from our new neighbor! Hooray (*sarcasm alert*). It says:

"Welcome to the neighborhood (... riiiiight.) park your car in my space again and I will have it towed at your expiense. xxoo"

So apparently the maintenance man came to spray paint the spot my car was in as an assigned spot for someone else, never knocked on my door or left me a note. My car had been there for the past ten months and wasn't moved once so I didn't leave and come back and park in "his spot" after it was assigned. AND apparently my new neighbor is a dickless piece of shit who wants to leave threatening misspelled notes on my car to "welcome" me to the neighborhood when I've lived here for quite some time, yet does not even introduce himself or politely ask me to move my car although I was standing outside for about ten to fifteen minutes. Wow. How do I manage to be such an enormous asshole on a daily basis?

Welcome to the neighborhood indeed.